Woman Wednesday: Melanie


Q and A with Melanie, Cape Town, South Africa

“Always be teachable.”


Q: What are you passionate about? 

A: My name is Melanie Rutgers, and I am from Cape Town, South Africa. I love creating things as well as opportunities and experiences that influence and effect change for whomever that change is for at that moment hoping that it will have a lasting impact.

The current space I am in is women transitioning into menopause and midlife, creating platforms and events where they become empowered with information to go through the transition a lot easier and safer based on several factors.

I am very passionate about the work that I am currently busy with because I had a horrible experience during my transition and struggled to understand and manage it as I discovered that there was very little information about women going through this phase of their lives. Among other things, I am an educational and training development practitioner, which simply means that I am qualified to facilitate information for educational purposes.

Q: What were your younger years like?

A: I am college educated and have post-grad studies in business strategy and organizational development. I had a good middle-class upbringing and always got into trouble for asking way too many questions! I found that I had a passion to create from very early in my life and that I could use my voice to make a difference. I was always creating opportunities and experiences and events in our neighborhood and community and had a large variety of friends, much to my parent’s distress at times. [She laughs.]

The biggest lesson that I have learned about my story so far is that in one’s pursuit of finding more (whatever that more is), it is important not to always make impulsive decisions; some things need careful thought and planning because they can have severe consequences on those closest to you. Always be teachable.

Q: What is something valuable you’d like others to know?

A: Let me just say that it costs you if you become anything close to what is now coined as a solopreneur. You have to believe that what you are doing is your life’s work! So, we are currently fundraising to televise an event where we can take information to women who don’t have access to quality health care in our country, on a much larger scale than we have been doing so they can also be well and a lot more informed but most importantly, to know that they are not alone.

Q: What does feminism mean to you?
A:
Let me start by saying kudos to every woman who has ever fought for women’s rights and even went as far as changing legislation so that our voices could be heard; however, as far as feminism goes, in my opinion, it does not always need to be a fight to prove that we are worthy and capable in any one particular way or another because there is nothing to compete against. Women possess uniqueness, power, class, and strength that is unprecedented. Firstly, it is divine and very well-thought-out because we can create, influence, and maintain excellent multitasking power that no other creature on this planet has been blessed with! And those who seem not to possess what I am talking about, know that it exists, it’s there beneath what appears as brokenness; given the time and the right circumstance, it will be uncovered.

PS. I forgot to mention that I am also a talk show host and producer. This is me in the center with my two guests and two of the crew.

Thank you for reading!

Woman Wednesday: Ruby J.

   


Q and A with Ruby J., Sierra Leone, West Africa

“Three things: take care of your mental health, control your narrative, and work smart and do your research.” 

Q: What are you passionate about? 

A: I am a mining engineer and currently work at a gold mining operation. I am also the founder and editorial director of STEMher by Ruby B. Johnson Magazine.

Premiered in September 2018 with its autumn issue, STEMher Magazine is a print magazine showcasing the education and experiences of girls and women in science, technology, engineering, and/or mathematics (STEM) academia, careers, and programs. STEMher celebrates women thriving in their careers and inspires others to fuel their curiosity and interests in STEM; the status of individuals featured range from middle school through retirement.

In one year, STEMher has featured more than 50 STEM girls and women worldwide from countries like the United States of America, Australia, Ghana, Canada, South Africa, India, France, Nigeria, Channel Islands, The Bahamas, Sierra Leone, and England. All magazine issues are available for purchase on stemher.com and Amazon Marketplace.

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Summer 2019 Cover

Q: What were your younger years like?

A: I was born in Freetown, Sierra Leone [in West Africa]. I moved to the United States when I was 12 years old, which meant growing up and completing my middle school and high school education in Maryland. I graduated from Virginia Tech with a BS in mining engineering and a minor in women’s studies leadership.

While in college, I founded When You Believe Foundation, a program that empowers women and girls through social media engagement, workshops, and donations.

In 2012, I competed in my first pageant, Miss Sierra Leone USA, with the platform of advocating for the recruitment and retention of girls and women in STEM fields, since I was a STEM college student at the time and women’s empowerment was something I was passionate about. I won the pageant and with that title, I was able to travel across the country as well as in Sierra Leone, encouraging girls and young women to pursue STEM.

After the crowns and titles, STEM advocacy and women’s empowerment continues to be my lifelong platform. I wanted to take this platform to another level to be able to reach women and girls I may never cross paths with, so I created STEMher by Ruby B. Johnson Magazine last year. 

 

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Q: What is something valuable you’ve learned that you’d like others to know? 

A: Three things: take care of your mental health, control your narrative, and work smart and do your research.

(1) From Monday through Thursdays, I work ten-hour days and a two-hour commute to and from work. Additionally, I am an entrepreneur who runs her own business creating content and putting together each issue for STEMher by Ruby B. Johnson Magazine. I also serve in a couple of ministries at my church. Life gets busy. In the last year, I’m being intentional to prioritize my mental health. Making time to rest and slow down when necessary. In order to be productive with work, I have to take care of myself by sleeping, eating healthy, exercising, spending time with God through prayer, and meditation as well as reading my Bible. I have to be intentional about making time for myself, family and friends, as well as work. It’s okay to say “no” or “not yet” sometimes. I cannot fill the cups of others when my cup is empty. It’s also okay to ask for help—whether it’s in prayer, family and friends, community, or therapy.

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(2) As I navigate through the professional world and life in general, I’m realizing how important it is for one to control their narrative. Of course we cannot fully control what people say about us or how they feel about us; however, I believe we can play a role in those things. The way we carry ourselves is very important. We have to learn wisdom on when to speak up or be silent. We must be our biggest defenders and tell people how we want them to treat or address us.

(3) Running a business is no easy feat and it’s time-consuming. In college, I learned to not study hard but study smart. I believe that’s important to do when you are a business owner. Being that I don’t have a business or journalism background, I spend a lot of time learning—asking questions, reading articles, listening to podcasts, and everything else in between. I want this magazine to go beyond, so that means I have to put in the work. I may not see harvest immediately, but sowing seeds each day counts. All in all, I believe it’s important to know who you are, stand firm on your values, always remember your why, and never lose your humanity no matter what environment you are in. 

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Q: What does feminism mean to you? 

A: To me, feminism means being my authentic self, living out my God-given purpose, and being intentional about making a difference in the community. While working on my women’s studies leadership minor in college, I learned about intersectionality. I am a Christian woman, born and raised in Sierra Leone, a naturalized American citizen, a woman in STEM, usually one of few or only black people in some professional settings, and a family-oriented individual. I thrive because of these lived experiences but also have a heart and a curious mind to learn about those who are different from me. Feminism to me is never compromising my faith and also being compassionate to others. To me, feminism means to reach for excellence and nothing less.

I’d love to connect with you!

Important Links
 

Thoughts, questions, or comments?

Comment below! 🙂

Woman Wednesday: Maria T.


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That, for me, is feminism.

Comment below! 🙂

Woman Wednesday: Vivian


Q and A with Vivian from Bloomingdale, Illinois

“Never be afraid to try something new. If your heart’s not in it and pulls you toward something else, let it guide you. ”


Q: Tell us about yourself.

A: Hello! My name is Vivian, and I’m passionate about helping others. I am the owner of Xpressive Mocha Cafe, which was created because my husband and I wanted something natural to aid in the healing of our son’s eczema. After discovering shea butter and the wonderful benefits it offers, I began to mix the butter with essential oils to create something that was not only working but assisted in giving my son’s skin the extra moisture it needed.

After being asked what I was using, Xpressive Mocha was born. Me being a coffee lover as well, I knew the caffeine in coffee would just be a bonus so I added that as well as tea. Our online store was created in 2014. Since then, fast forward to 2022, we opened our storefront in Bloomingdale, Illinois.

At the Xpressive Mocha Cafe, our passion for skincare allows us to provide helpful information and products that help with the treatment of eczema, psoriasis, and other personal skincare issues. We provide skin consultations with clients to discuss their skincare concerns; educate clients on how to use skincare products and provide product demonstrations; we plan, organize, and participate in skincare events and shows; and give accessibility to order new skincare supplies and maintain relationships with our customers.

Our body butter doesn’t contain any preservatives. To use it, you simply put a small amount on your fingers and rub it into your skin, just as you would with lotion. Body butter is thicker than lotion, so you don’t need a lot to moisturize.

Q: What were your younger years like?

A: I’m from a small area in Wisconsin where everyone knows everyone and you are a community. I remember cooking with my mom daily and imagining I was making a meal for my imaginary family. I’m from a family of 10 children, so we did a lot of cooking. Cooking and experimenting have always been a passion of mine. When I had to take home economics in school, that just solidified that making things with my hands was a stress reliever for me. I was always a fan of chemistry class because it intrigued me, and my teacher was wonderful! I believe this is the same passion that drives me to create my plant-based products for men and women today.

Q: What is something valuable you’d like others to know?

A: Something valuable I would like to share with everyone is to never be afraid to try something new. If your heart’s not in it and pulls you toward something else, let it guide you. When I first started college, I truly believed I was going to be a lawyer and that it would be great. One computer class changed my life. It’s as if I had found my calling and switched career paths that day. I continued with the information technology world for years before having kids and discovering my newfound love. After moving from Wisconsin to Illinois, I became a computer science instructor and did that for seven years. Covid proved to me that time waits for no one and you have to go for your dreams now. Quitting and persuading myself to go after my dream of having a storefront was the best decision I could have made.

Q: What does feminism mean to you?
A:
Feminism to me means being true to yourself and taking advantage of all the opportunities that are available to help you. As well as having multiple sisters to confide in along the way when you feel you can’t.

Thank you for reading! Connect with me:

Xpressive Mocha Cafe

Woman Wednesday: Erin W.


Q and A with Erin W. from Raleigh, North Carolina

“Boundaries that aren’t enforced aren’t boundaries. ”


Q: What are you passionate about?

A: So many things! I love reading, and always have, which ultimately sort of accidentally spilled into writing books and building a business out of authoring. I’m a licensed professional counselor, and I still work a couple days a week as a counselor doing mental health therapy with clients, and then I write every day, in every spare moment from that! I write therapeutic children’s picture books like I Love You When You’re Angry and When a Donut Goes to Therapy under Erin Winters, and then on the other side of the spectrum, I write YA fantasy novels under E.A. Winters!

We’re a military family and our boys are two and almost four years old. I have a therapeutic deployment book launching on Kickstarter in May, and a new children’s book about a super cute lamb that’s based on Psalm 23 and will be illustrated this summer.

As for novels, book #2 in my dragons and assassins series launched just yesterday, and I’m finishing up writing book #4 now! Book #3 drops in April, and book #4 in June, so I stay pretty busy. I want to offer heartwarming, therapeutic children’s books promoting emotional learning and normalizing having conversations about feelings with kids on a variety of topics. I was surprised to find there were so few picture books doing this effectively, and blown away by the response I’ve gotten to my books. In regard to fantasy novels, they’re honestly escapism. Daring adventures, sword fights, dragons, assassins…what could be better, right? I also discovered they were cathartic for me, and phenomenal self-care, and I get grumpy if I haven’t written in a couple of days. I think almost accidentally, I discovered part of what I do is provide wholesome family-friendly fantasy that refuses to romanticize toxic relationships but shows realistic people overcoming enormous challenges. What hope there is in that! If they can do it, and be brave enough to face the monsters within along the way, surely so can we.

Q: What were your younger years like?

A: I was homeschooled all the way through. My parents did an incredible job, and I hope I do half as well. I respect them so much. My dad is a mechanical engineer and my mom has degrees in biochemistry and zoology. Critical thinking skills were always emphasized growing up. My mom currently teaches high school science classes to about 150 homeschoolers across a number of different classes. For extracurriculars, I was in a singing ensemble, did drama, and loved it. I also did piano but didn’t apply myself like I probably should have. My relationship with God has been the biggest factor in my life overall, and spine surgery at age 13 taught me a lot about not being in control. I also had the opportunity to serve others overseas on short-term trips a couple of times, and the experiences I gained impacted me in huge ways.

Q: What is something valuable you’d like others to know?

A: Therapeutically, something I say a lot is that boundaries that aren’t enforced aren’t boundaries. So, there you go. Personally, I’ve learned that being in control of life is an illusion. The only person in control is God, so without Him, we’re all sort of just swirling around in a storm-filled ocean, clinging to driftwood and hoping we hit land. And since having kids, there’s a lot I have left to learn, but I think taking care of yourself so that you have the mental space to pour out is really important. Being sacrificial, patient, and consistent is so important. And doing whatever I need to do to work on myself to get to a place where I can be that way needs to be a top priority for my own sanity as well as the best for my family!

Q: What does feminism mean to you?
A:
There are way too many definitions for this word. As a therapist, I see terms being tossed about all the time with no grounding, so it’s important to define our terms carefully, and unless there’s a reason to use an operational definition, the regular one does just fine. Google says this: “The advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.” I think it’s apparent that men and women are equal. Equal in worth, intelligence, and having a broad scope of personalities, desires, and all the complexities within humanity. People should never be discriminated against by their age, gender, or race. It harms men and women alike when either gender is devalued, no matter which side is doing it.

Thank you for reading! Connect with me:

Children’s books: Website: https://www.snowfallpublications.com

Children’s books: Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Erin-Winters/author/B08242WP2F https://www.eawinters.com

Fantasy novels Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/stores/E.A.-Winters/author/B09YQJKGXK

TikTok: @EAWinters